What to do if You Make a Parenting Mistake

legacyproject.human.cornell.edu

You are not alone.  We all make parenting mistakes.  Often.  Don't beat yourself up.  Just learn from it.  Try to do better next time.  Forgive yourself.  You will find your children are very forgiving.  I can't count how many mistakes I have made, but when I apologize, all is forgiven, and we even laugh about it together.  Often the conversations that happen after the apology are very precious and build your relationship even stronger.  If you keep making the same mistake over and over, just keep trying.  Do not give up.  You will get stronger over time and as you get more sleep.  I remember I would sometimes get grumpy at my kids when they kept getting out of bed at night.  A short fuse from little sleep.  But all that has gone away.  I got better over time....and you will too.  Forgive yourself.  You will get stronger and your parenting skills will grow with time and experience.  I know this from my own experience.  Today I found myself not getting angry when my child made unreasonable demands in a rude voice.  I calmly told her the right way to ask me, and she immediately fixed the problem with no drama.  I thought...boy I've come a long way, to be able to do that.  And you will to.

Talking about Tough Topics

(www.lds.org)

This is the best article I've ever read about how to parent well.  I LOVED it.  I wish everyone in the world could read it.  Click the caption to go there.

Children Need to Know

(Joshshipp.com)

I started yet ANOTHER Blog!

I know, I know, I already have two blogs going, a writing one and a parenting one, but now I've started a SEWING blog because my daughter got a new sewing machine for Christmas and I wanted to document our projects together.  Click Here to check it out!  Below is one of our first posts!

Here's a picture of my 12 year old daughter.  Together our first project was this zippered pouch below.  I think it turned out rather well!  What do you think?

Below is the tutorial we used. (Click the caption to go there)

www.buttercreamandasewingmachine.com

One important thing to do with your Family!

(http://livelikeyouarerich.com)

I LOVED this post about Family Meal Time and how you can make it work. I agree that our family meals together make a HUGE difference.  This is one way families bond together and family bonding helps kids resist peer pressure!  Click Here to read it!

You do so much Good in the World

7 Crippling Parenting Behaviors that limit your Child's Success

(Forbes.com)

I found this article from Forbes magazine who is also doing a good parenting series, called "7 Crippling Behaviors that Limit Our Child's Success".  Here is a link to it.  It was a really great article with good insights.

I have to add my own two cents in here too.  I think one more crippling behavior is that sometimes we "validate" our childrens' tendency to behave as "victims".  When kids are mean to them at school, we teach them that those kids are mean and they should be nicer.  We go to the principle, or talk to the teacher and behave as if it is others' responsibility to make our kids happy.  But I'm wondering if this isn't a little bit backwards.  We can't change the outside world...there will always be mean kids, or hard circumstances.  Maybe we have to change our kids, to be able to be stronger inside:  strong enough to handle hard times.  They have to know that true happiness comes from within, and that they can be happy in spite of kids who are mean, or circumstances that are hard.  We can strengthen our children and teach them coping skills.  We can teach them how to find happiness in developing their talents, strengthening family relationships, or reaching out to other kids who might need a friend.  That way they don't have to depend on others for happiness, and though they might feel bad  that life is not exactly the way they would like it, they can still be happy.

I just think that we do our children a disservice by trying to smooth the way for them.  Life will always be hard.  So maybe the answer is that they need strength within, so they will always be up to the challenges life throws at them.   And we need to teach them how to do it.

The Good Kid Project

(www.bhg.com)

I was so excited to see in Better Homes and Gardens they are doing a year-long series called the "Good Kid Project," where they explore the twelve qualities children need to develop to succeed.  This month they are talking about perseverance.  In previous months they've talked about civility, compassion, and self-reliance.  You can read about it here.

Best Teen Parenting Book Ever!

(source: breakthecycle.org)

In regards to family ups and downs, which most of my readers are interested in, I have to share my enthusiasm for Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish.  I just finished reading, "How to talk so TEENS will listen and listen so TEENS will talk", and it is the best book ever!  If I could buy this for every parent of teenagers I would.  If you read this book your life will be MUCH easier.   These are the methods I use on my teens and they are the ONLY things that work, along with the 5 languages of love.  I know because I've tried it all.  Hope it helps with your teens too!

Moments That Matter Most

Loved this video about focusing on your family in life!

Fathers are so Important!